Why Me?
by Grothnack
Summary: It was just some LARP to let out some stress from the university exams... Why I have to deal now with characters from the Lord of the Rings? And of course, I had to alter the books by saving Boromir, stranding an horde of Uruk-Hai in my world along two hobbits, one man, one dwarf and one elf... The only thing I can think is... why me? Contain some swearing. ON HIATUS
1. A battle that went wrong

**Hello everyone, sorry for not updating the rest of my stories, but I needed to get some things out of my system, and I am currently in a writer block on most of my stories. I will try to write them up sooner or later, but right now, I just put this story I thought it would be funny to see. Just enjoy the mishaps.**

\- "Come on! We must reach the hill if we want to ambush them!" – A cry could be heard in the forest, as I ran along my friends. I was at a forest, plenty of hills and some ruins to top the scenery, doing some LARP. I was a battle mage, with a shield in my left arm and a sword in my right hand, and as further protection leather armour. I was a bit overweight, and clearly not someone who would want to exercise so much, but in this case I was having a lot of fun with my friends. Not always I could enjoy fighting without any worries, and I needed some way to release the stress of studying for exams at the university.

\- "Ok, we reached the position. Now, the formation." – Pedro said. He was the friend who convinced me to participate in this, and I was glad I followed him. As for the moment, we already fought some people, and beat them without taking damage. I was glad that I could use the shield, otherwise I would be already beaten and out of the game. Pablo was taller than me, slender with dark long hair and using a plate armour with a shield and a sword. We were a total of eight people, counting me of course.

\- "We will form a shield wall. Samael, Varick, Ingrid and me will be there. The rest will cover our rear and flanks." – Pedro; also called Ulric on game, ordered, and I put myself in my position. My real name was Markus, but while we were on game, I had to go with the name of my character. I sighed, trying to relax a bit while I was thinking on how I would have to fight, but then, I felt the nature calling in my rear, and wanting an out immediately.

\- "Guys… I have to go to the toilet." – I said, a bit ashamed of it, but they nodded and looked at me with some humour in their faces. – "Go on, we will signal them to wait." – Adrian, the one who was Varick and with the plate armour too, told me, and I sighed happily as I started running toward one of the special toilets they had along the camp. The forest and the ruins were really good for this type of battles, and they reminded of the scenes of Amon Hen of the Lord of the Rings, so I was happy to even think of the battle.

I reached the toilets, and after some pained minutes, I was feeling refreshed and prepared to fight. I started going again to the place, and had to go by a clear part of the forest, but then, I watched as some strange people were running… well, maybe they were people of the LARP dressed as Uruk-Hai, I could see an orc among the players after all. But then, I started to hear a sound which I never heard before, a sound that resounded in my heart. I ran toward it, and then I saw in front of me one of the Uruk-Hai, with a sword in his hand and going to cut me down like a log.

I ducked to avoid it, and then I pushed him, making him hit a tree with his head and fell limp. I could see how his neck was put in a strange way, and my blood ran cold. I killed someone! I was going to go to prison, or worse… but as I tried to calm myself, I could see that the man looked nothing like it… For a moment, I thought that it was a very good makeup, but when I tried to remove it… it didn't remove. It was real… a real Uruk-Hai, and there were a lot of them here.

I gulped, and I could hear sounds of fighting and cries of hurt people. My friends probably were fighting too, trying to save themselves, but probably they were a lot more prepared than me… most of them were with plate armour while I only had leather, which in the end it didn't protect anything. I left the sword I had; as it would be useless in this situation, and tried to grab the sword of the Uruk-Hai, having problems to lift it, but it would have to work, and changed the shield of the one the Uruk-Hai had, having some troubles to remove it from his arm and then put it on mine.

I started to run, watching how a lot of Uruk-Hai were running toward one place… and my memory clicked. This place was exactly like Amon-Hen, so maybe… - "No fucking way…" - I said to myself, as I ran as fast as I could. If this is exactly like that, I could already think on how it would develop, and it was clear that it would be a very grim situation. My friends and I weren't prepared for this, we only wanted to do some battles, imitations and that sort of things, no trying to survive right now. With the amount of Uruk-Hai in the place, it would be very easy to be overrun by them.

As I ran, I had to stop as I was watching something impossible… I could see how a man was fighting with a sword, blowing a horn with the same sound I heard before, and some little people throwing rocks toward the Uruk-Hai with very good accuracy. It was very clear that they were Boromir, Merry and Pippin… and at the back of the horde of Uruk-Hai, I could see Lurtz tensing the bow, pointing it toward Boromir. I ran, and then I put the shield up, surprising Boromir for a moment, before I felt a big impact on the shield making me go to the ground.

I rolled, as I got up and put myself again, feeling two more impacts in the shield, and the fight Boromir put toward the Uruk-Hai intensified, but the wave of Uruk-Hai went through us, grabbing Merrin and Pippin while I was merely using my shield to avoid the swords and protecting Boromir from the arrows which came from Lurtz. The flow of the fight went through, and I couldn't even guess how I ended up in front of Lurtz.

I put my shield up again, as I watched how a sword came toward my head. I had to tumble a bit after that hit, but I could put again my shield up to avoid a second hit, but the impact made me go to the floor in a heap and the shield flew out of my arm, leaving me without any effective protection. I grabbed the sword I had with me with my two hands, and I used it to parry a lethal blow as I rolled to pull myself up. My heart was pounding hard, and I was so scared but I couldn't even think of running or another thing to save myself.

Lurtz came toward me again, and I put again the sword in the way, but the strength behind the blow sent me flying toward a tree, leaving my back in the tree and the pain shot through my body. I closed my eyes for a moment, before I opened them again to see how a sword came toward my head. I ducked, and that sword embedded on the tree. I rolled and I could see Lurtz trying to remove the sword from the tree.

I made a war cry, or a desperate one, as I put up the sword I had in my hands with all my strength, and made it descend toward the skull of Lurtz. I could hear a sickening crunch and the resistance of the sword as it continued until it stopped in somewhere between the chest and its side… and I dropped the sword, making the body of Lurtz go down and embedding the sword more.

I could only watch the body, and my hands now coated in blood. I felt sick, and threw up the lunch without any announcement. I only wanted to have fun fighting with enough security that only bruises would be present, and ended up fighting in a scene of the damn Lord of the Rings film for my dear life. And I didn't know about my friends… Were they alive, dead…? The sounds of battle weren't anymore, and steps could be heard in my direction.

\- "You saved my life. I am in your debt." – A voice said, and I turned, seeing Boromir looking at me with a solemn face. I could vaguely remember that people from medieval ages were always going on about honor, and I could see that now. I merely nodded, and I could even vaguely feel that I was kneeling on the ground, shaking like a leaf. I could hear more people coming, but I couldn't even move, I was feeling like this was a nightmare.

\- "Markus!" – I heard, and felt someone trying to make me get up. I could see Pedro and Adrian looking at me, with obvious dents in their armour but otherwise fine, with worried faces. I could see the rest of my friends, and I started to cry in relief, as everyone were alive. Boromir was watching but stayed silent and took a look at the direction which went the Uruk-Hai with the hobbits.

Everything was a blur afterward, as I went toward a special medical area of the place, where there were a lot of people hurt. I couldn't see a body, so luckily no one was killed, but after everything I went through, I was only willing to comply. There were a lot of bandages on most people, and I could feel how I was being given the notice that I was one of the "lucky ones" which were free to go home as I wasn't hurt enough to go to the hospital.

I sat on one of the benches prepared for the people to eat, and tried to make sense, but that wasn't on the plan as I saw Boromir going toward me. – "I am Boromir, son of Denethor, Steward of Gondor." – He said, extending his hand toward me. I grabbed his hand, trying to reciprocate the gesture but I had to try two times until I got my voice again.

\- "I am Markus…" - I said weakly, and Boromir nodded, sitting beside me. I put my hands again in my face, closing my eyes as I tried to rationalize how the hell I had the fucking Boromir here, and possibly Merrin and Pippin lost somewhere along a big horde of Uruk-Hai. Possibly they would be killed on sight by the government, but maybe they went to the universe of where they came from, as I couldn't hear more panic shouting and no news about that horde.

\- "Where are we? This is no place I can relate to Middle Earth." – Said Boromir, and I could feel a bit better as I had something to do… even if it was to deal with a supposedly fictional character from a book and films who should have died instead of lived as I put myself between Lurtz and him.

\- "Well, this world is called Earth, and… well, most explanations would work better if I had the books to show you and so on… The only thing I want to do right now is go home…" - I said, trying to figure how I could explain everything, but at the end, I was at a dead end, as everything would be questioned, and I needed to have some facts before I could deal with everything else… and it didn't help that I had to go to class tomorrow.

\- "I guess that you should come with me." – I said, and the look of Boromir was one that told me I would have to fight a bit to convince him to accede this, but at least he wasn't going to put a physical fight… I doubted I could win that one without kicking in the nuts.

\- "I couldn't importunate you anymore. I have to go after the hobbits, they are in danger and I have to look after my comrades." – Boromir said, but before he could say anymore, I put my hand in his mouth and looked at him angrily, as I was tired and didn't want to deal with anything at the moment, or at least having a discussion about something that I was right.

\- "Look, I am tired, wanting to go home after a fucking battle for my life, and you have no idea of where to look after them. So you are coming with me so we can plan better… and take a damn shower, you stink!" – I said, afterward I started to smell something horrid. Damn, I forgot that in the medieval era the part of taking care of hygiene was something overlooked at most except for some people.

\- "What's a shower?" – Boromir ended up asking, and I put my hands again in my face with a groan. Yes, I opened the Pandora's Box right away… - "Later…" - I said, not knowing what I would even do after all of this. – "Just follow me, and please stay silent…" - I ended up pleading as I watched my friends coming toward me, without their armour and looking battered and ready to go home.

\- "We are going to go now. Do you need us to take you home?" – Adrian asked, while making motions for me to approach to remove my armour… I forgot that I was still wearing it. I felt the weight being removed, and my shoulders relax, as well as the arms and legs started to feel the cool air after removing the protections from there. I sighed in relief as I relaxed a bit more.

\- "Yeah, and this guy needs one too if you don't mind. He lives near me." – I said, and they agreed readily enough, as they wanted to go home and just forget everything about this day. I had to discuss a bit more with Boromir to follow me, as he watched in puzzlement the car, before entering at my silent insistence and then in amazement at how everything looked. Luckily, everyone was just dealing with their own demons of the battle and didn't take notice of this.

Then, we reached my home, a nice apartment where I was paying a rent from a partial job I was doing. After some more prodding to enter the elevator; which didn't feel well to Boromir to be in a reduced space, we reached the door and I opened it, making Boromir enter before I closed the door behind me, grateful to be at home right now.

\- "This is so different from Middle Earth. What was the contraption we used to travel here? And the one we used to get to this height? And what's a shower?" – Boromir asked, reminding me that he was here. I groaned and put again my hands in my face, something I was feeling I would do a lot of times while dealing with this…


	2. Long Night

**Well, here I am again, enjoy this chapter. And I am looking for a Beta Reader for most of my stories.**

I sighed, already knowing that I would have to explain a lot… well, everything about Earth, its technology, and a very big etc to Boromir, but I was ready to just go to bed and ignore everything. – "Alright… we are just tired, hungry and you have questions. How about we put ourselves comfy and I start explaining everything the best I can?" – I said, trying to delay the interrogation I knew it was coming sooner or later. And I wanted to relax under the shower a lot… and I would have to explain how it worked the shower, indoor plumbing, electricity…

\- "Okay, now that I think, I will show you what a shower is and why you need it. Follow me to the bathroom." – I said, making a gesture to make him follow. Boromir merely nodded, curiosity in his face as something new was going to be explained. I opened the door, and I showed him the bathroom that had a toilet, a mirror, and of course the bath. Of course, Boromir had the look of someone who was discovering wonders impossible to imagine… This was going to be a pain in the ass, I could already feel it.

\- "This is the shower." – I said, pointing out the shower. – "It works like this: You turn this gavel up, and it starts flowing water, and if you want it warmer you turn it to the left, if you want it colder to the right. If you want more water flowing, continue turning up the gavel, if you want it to stop, make it go down." – I continued, and I could hear the gasp of Boromir when I started showing how it worked, and then trying the water with his hand, feeling how it became warm and then cold.

\- "Is it sorcery?" – Boromir asked, with a bit of mistrust in his eyes… clearly he wasn't one who liked those things… - "It's not sorcery… in this place magic doesn't exist. It's replaced by technology… I will explain later. In these bottles you have shampoo and gel; products to get rid of the dirt and so on of your body and hair, shampoo for the hair and gel for the body." – I continued, pointing out the bottles.

\- "Now, I will let you refresh yourself, I will put you by the door some clothes." – I finished, and I went off the bathroom, closing the door for privacy. I sighed, as I went to my bedroom, opening my wardrobe and pulling out one of my larger pyjamas I had. Probably it will end up big on the sides; I am overweight and Boromir wasn't after all, and pulled one of my underpants too and slippers. Once I made sure I had everything for Boromir, I put it by the door, and listened a moment, hearing the water falling from the shower.

I went afterward to the kitchen, and started to look for something to eat, going to the freezer and pulling out some fried chicken. Afterward I put it on the microwave to defrost them while the fryer was heating. Once I made sure that it was defrosted the fried chicken I started frying them. Then, I heard some steps and turned, looking at Boromir with my clothes; who looked comfy on them so it was a problem solved in this case.

\- "Thanks for the clothes. What are you cooking?" – Boromir asked, looking at the fryer with curiosity and sniffing the smell of the fried food. I got the fried chicken out for a moment to check on them, and they were ready, so I disconnected the fryer to let it cool down, as I put the fried chicken on plates.

\- "It's no problem. And this is fried chicken, it's made from chicken enveloped in bread crumps and egg yolk, and finally bathed in hot oil." – I said, putting it on the table I had on the kitchen, and went to the fridge, grabbing a beer and pineapple juice. I put the beer to Boromir and the pineapple juice to me, and started eating, and I got a good laugh as Boromir had to drink the cold beer because he took one piece of the fried chicken without blowing a bit to cool it down.

\- "This is good. " – Boromir started saying, after he got the piece of chicken cooled down and ate it. I nodded, and continued eating, already finishing as I wanted to go to the shower and finish relaxing a bit.

\- "What are we going to do? Merry and Pippin are missing along that pack of Uruk-Hai." – Boromir said, and I sighed, as I wished for something to go my way for once instead of dealing with this.

\- "At the moment we can only wait. We don't even know where they took off. Luckily, I will have news this week, or so." – I said, but my insides were churning with worry. What would happen if the military got hold of them before we did something? The hobbits could be killed in the cross-fire, and that with luck, as the government could get them and make dissections… Yeah, this was very bad if I couldn't do anything. But outside I was doing a reassuring smile… I was so used to mask my real emotions that this was piece of cake.

Boromir sighed, and we continued eating. Boromir was deep in thoughts and I didn't want to disturb him. He was dealing with a big amount of stress after all, and he couldn't trust that easily on me. Probably I would have to keep an eye on him… Well, I will have to call in sick, I doubted that they would say they have problems, I had always a perfect attendance. I sighed as I reached my phone, ready to call in sick, but then Boromir looked at the device with mistrust… again I would need to explain. This was going to get old really soon.

\- "It's a mobile phone… allows instant communication between two people in great distances. Think about being able to contact people in all your country with only pushing a few buttons." – I said, and the look of wonder was clear, along a thinking one. It was clear that he was giving thoughts to see how he could take some of the technology of my world to his world. And I had to admit that if I were to take some tanks or weaponry to Middle Earth, the orcs and Uruk-Hai would be decimated in seconds… but well, I would try to keep that part of my world a secret for the most part.

I put the contact list, and then searched for the boss number, clicking it and started ringing. Soon, I heard the typical sound of the other end of the line. – "Hello, who am I talking?" – Said my boss, with a boring tone in his voice. He would be at this time probably waiting for his shift to end to close his shop, so I could guess that he wanted to rest a bit from his work, or in this case wanting a distraction badly.

\- "I am Markus, and wanted to tell you that something came up and I can't work tomorrow." – I said, and I had to stifle a laugh as Boromir looked startled that I could have a conversation with another person without the other person actually being here. Probably I would have to let Boromir try it to make him believe that I wasn't some nutter or something like that.

\- "Ok, thanks for calling about… Wait. Is there an event here today? You know, the type of event where the people dress like one of those films of Lord of the Rings and so on?" – He said, and my blood ran cold. It was what I feared, but worse as I was directly hearing it. At least, I could try to make him avoid the full front of the danger.

\- "Boss, close the shop. If you have people inside, make them stay, don't open up and grab a weapon if you can. They are dangerous, those weapons are real." – I said, urgently and Boromir looked ready to run towards his weapon. I put my hand up, signalling him to wait. I had to make sure my boss was safe before taking any action. I could start hearing the heavy steps from a big horde coming, and I was sure that it was the Uruk-Hai coming.

\- "Please, don't make such jokes… But it seems the police is making his presence known…" - My boss started saying, but then I heard a gunshot, followed by a barrage and cries of people screaming.

\- "Boss!? Boss!? Please, talk to me!" – I shouted, alarmed and getting desperate. I couldn't do anything except hearing everything that was happening. –" B-ys, -ve- e-re, qu-ck-." – I could hear, being impossible to hear anything right with the amount of noise. Probably my boss was trying to do something with the people inside his shop, and I wished it was closing quickly the shop to avoid the Uruk-Hai coming closer, but probably they would just rip the door and enter anyway.

\- "What is happening?" – Boromir asked worried. I gulped, and by the face he was showing I wasn't hiding my desperation very well. I was about to answer when I heard something else, more gunshots and the mobile moving or something.

\- "Hello? How this thingy work? Am I doing this right, Merry?" – Someone said in the line, and I lifted my eyebrow… How the heck Pippin obtained the mobile phone of my boss? And the boss was alright or he was hurt?

\- "I don't know Pippin, but…" - I started hearing, but then I heard a struggle before I heard the voice of my boss again, interrupting the hobbits from saying anything more, and I can say that if the situation wasn't so dangerous over there, I would laugh at their tries to work the mobile phone.

\- "Markus, I will bring the kids to you in my jeep! Don't worry about safety, you know I am battle ready most of the time." – My boss shouted with some laughter, as another gunshot was heard, and both screams of indignation from the hobbits… of course they would be considered as kids, they had the same height and mostly the same personality as little kids.

\- "Al… Alright, be careful!" – I finally said, closing the mobile phone and sighed while I felt my legs like jelly, but I was grabbed by the arm. I turned and saw Boromir with an expression that wanted answers.

\- "Tell me what is happening. Now!" – Boromir shouted, with a piece of rage and concern, probably because the hobbits were in danger. If I wasn't so tired, I would be cowed in fear right now as his expression was murderous, but right now I was simply tired and wanting this day to end. And he started grabbing with more strength, making my arm start hurting.

\- "Just calm down, please… you are hurting me." – I said weakly, and that seemed to snap Boromir, as he released my arm, but his expression was anything but murderous still, requiring that I just explained everything the best I could.

\- "My boss is bringing the hobbits here. The Uruk-Hai horde were met with the police or the army and my boss could bring them to his shop. He is defending them and possibly they are coming here in the same transport we travelled before. We just… have to wait." – I said, while making my way to the sofa, and sitting there. My mind now was feeling just like giving up everything. Why it had to be me the one who had to deal with this shit?

\- "I apologise for my actions… I am just worried for the hobbits. Are you sure your boss is going to keep them safe?" – Boromir asked, sitting in front of me, in a chair. He looked less murderous and more concerned about everything, and I couldn't fault him there. And he apologised, not much people would do that.

\- "I can't think a better person to keep them safe. If he can't bring them, I doubt someone else can." – I said, and I truly believed that, as my boss was an ex-marine and with plenty experience in missions of protection, and he always had his guns nearby; the shots I heard through my phone was enough indication that he was already putting down the Uruk-Hai.

\- "And that police? What are them?" – Boromir asked, and I groaned. It was clear that I would have to do another round of answers with Boromir, and probably with the hobbits when my boss brought them.

\- "Think of them like guards." – I just said, as I closed my eyes and tried to relax my mind a bit, just to try to avoid a breakdown. The events of the day and then this, it was just too much for me. Boromir would have noted that I didn't want to talk right now, because he stayed silent. I pulled my legs up to my chest, and hugged them with my arms, putting my head on my legs to try to calm down, but it wasn't working.

\- "Everything shall be fine. You said so, believe in your own words." – Boromir said with confidence, but I couldn't even believe it myself… all of my day just went horribly wrong, and I just didn't know how to deal with it for how much time it would require for me.

\- "How can I believe it? Everything went wrong, I wasn't supposed to fight a real fight like that, I shouldn't be worrying about the life of my boss and the hobbits… it was supposed to be a day of fun, laughter and being with my friends…" - I said, as tears started to pour out of my eyes. I was breaking down, and I couldn't even say everything, as I doubted Boromir would want to know he would be killed instead of being alive right now…

\- "Sometimes, the Valar just decide things should go this way. We have to take things as they come." – Boromir said, but it was like saying things to the air. All I could think is why I had to deal with all of this. Then, I felt arms wrapping around me, and hands making my head move toward something, and I started hearing the beat of a heart… Boromir was holding me! Who could have thought that he would be this… gentle?

I don't know how much time passed, but finally my tears stopped, and looked up. Boromir smiled. – "This always worked with my brother… It seems that this works with you." – He said, with his eyes looking afar, probably thinking of Faramir, his brother which was a captain of the rangers of Gondor or something like that. But this was another thing that in the books and the films didn't show.

\- "Sorry…" - I started saying, but he just stopped me raising a hand in a universal signal to stop. – "There is no need. All of us had an arduous day, I would worry if you didn't have a breakdown." – Boromir said, and I felt so tired… maybe I could leave Boromir to attend to the arrival of my boss and the hobbits.

Then, the phone sounded and I sighed, not wanting to get up, but I just did that, only to see who was calling. In the phone was the number of my boss. – "Boss?" – I asked, worry increasing. If something happened, I wouldn't be able to deal with it right now, and I was praying that everything was going better now.

\- "We are down, open up please." – He said, and I bolted toward the intercom; opening up and the opening the door, waiting for the lift to take them to my floor. Boromir was behind me, looking worried too.

The doors of the lift opened, and two blond haired bolts ran toward Boromir, taking him down. For a moment I worried, but then the laughter of Boromir put me at ease. Then, I felt a hand grabbing my arm, and looked at my boss. – "You know… I didn't expect LOTR characters. Take the time you need… and be sure to bring them when you come to work. They need to pay for their expenses after all." – He said, before going out without saying another word. He was a man of few words, but with a good heart.

\- "Well, let's take this inside, please. I will prepare something to eat." – I said, and the hobbits bolted toward the kitchen, surely to wait for the food. Boromir followed them, surely to avoid them doing things they shouldn't. I sighed, as I went to make them the dinner… And possibly tomorrow I would have to go to the supermarket to buy more food…

After taking care of accommodations, making the hobbits sleep on one of the beds, Boromir on the other and me on the sofa, I just went directly to the dream realm…

\- "I'm sorry to invade your dreams, but we have much to talk, and much less time…" - A woman otherworldly voice caught my attention… Galadriel was speaking now to me in my dreams. Why couldn't I get a rest?


End file.
